"Living in the Grey" & Striped Grey top
Sometimes I feel like I am more than 1 person (sometimes I wish I was!)...But often I feel theres the one me that is "good", and one me that is not. Bear with me here.. Theres the good me that does all the right things, devotionals, clean house, bills paid, check check check. Then, theres the other me, the slacker me. The Lazy me. The Selfish me. The me that can't be inconvenienced, the one that cares for nothing but my own selfish desires. There's no grey, I'm either on it, or not. Good, or bad. No middle, just two extremes.
Recently I've been learning that the Lord lives in the grey.
He lives in the good and the bad. He does not wait until we leave behind our "bad" selves to get involved, nor does he feel we are deserving of extra love and blessings if we are always good. He meets us wherever we are, right here, when we are trying to find ourselves and identity, He patiently calls us to Him.
I don't have to abandon my bad habits before I can be called His. I don't have to do all the right things to be worthy of His love. Jesus died for me so that I cannot earn my way into His family, I was already bought with a price. Me. He fought for ME and YOU .
For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith—and this is not from yourselves, it is the gift of God— 9 not by works, so that no one can boast. 10 For we are God’s handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do. Ephesians 2:8-10
It has taken me nearly 30 years to realize that it is not about finding yourself, but allowing God to find you. Only then will you realize who you truly are: a beloved child of the King of the universe. Fiercely fought for and deeply treasured. Thank you Lord.